I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
