What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
