I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Say something about gay babies.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
