Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
