I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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