Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
