And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
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man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
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I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.