I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
