She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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