Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
