it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Randomize
