And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
