Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You pole danced in your parka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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