Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
