So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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