I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
