i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize