I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Help me help you realize you are a moron
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize