Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
