put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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