69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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