Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize