Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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