Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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