I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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