i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
