I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Mom said you looked used
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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