She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
