at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
where am i from again
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
