i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
