This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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