i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
she pinky promised me she was 18
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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