Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
When are your genitals available?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
