We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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