You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
