his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize