I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Slut skills are useful in every country.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Randomize
