im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
it was like eating out sand paper
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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