I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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