and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
It's blow job season.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
