Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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