Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
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