Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Are we still banned from the library?
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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