Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
