Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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