I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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