Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize