matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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