It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
