how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sorry about my life...
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