Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
